Why is it difficult to ask for help?

Motherhood has helped me recognize that I have a major weakness. That weakness is not knowing how to ask for help. My husband shared that his college football coach would always say, “One of the most powerful words in the dictionary, is the word ‘help’!” I responded with a quote from Spike Lees’s classic movie, Do The Right Thing?’ “And that’s the truth, Ruth”. I know that I am drowning from my daily life routine, and yet, I cannot say the word ‘help’. Why can’t I say it? What am I scared of?! I am scared that my expectations will lead to disappointment. That disappointment will lead me to withdrawing from asking for help. Also, does the fear of not having full control play a part on me not asking for help? No matter the reasoning, I need the tools and resources to tend to my mental, spiritual and physical health. I need to show my children that it is simply okay to ask for help and accept support. I talk to my mom about my struggles of being a homeschooling, full-time working mom and she always says “Sarah, you are doing way too much. If you don’t sit down somewhere and get help.” My response back is always “I know mama. I will,” but I don’t. I keep putting it off, but I just need to ask for help. Little by little I am going to give myself grace and grow in vulnerability. This is a top priority in my life right now. Self-care is asking for help in a life of beautiful chaos. 2024, let’s go!!